Bullying is More Common Among Children With Hearing Impairments
Sadly bullying is common in children with disabilities, including hearing-impaired children. A 2018 University of Dallas study identified that children with a hearing loss are twice more likely to be bullied than their normal hearing peers. Additionally, those children with a hearing aid or cochlear implants are more likely to be bullied than children without a hearing device.
What do bullies do?
Common bullying behaviors include name calling, teasing or ridiculing, social exclusion, spreading rumours and turning other children against the targeted child. Bullying can also turn physical such as hitting or kicking. In the case of children with hearing loss or communication disorders, bullies may use a feature of the child’s disability to bully them, such as creeping up behind them to scare them or imitating their speech or sign-language in a teasing way. Obviously, these actions can be highly distressing for the affected child and their parent as well.
What are the signs of bullying?
Some of the signs a child might be being bullied include:
· A sudden refusal to attend school (or the place where the bullying is happening).
· A change in their school performance – are they suddenly struggling more in class?
· Reduced participation in after school events or social events
· Appearing sad, depressed or angry, losing their temper quickly
· Decreased interest in friendships
· Refusing to wear their hearing aid or cochlear implant.
Acceptance increases resilience
The good news is there are strategies we can give our children with hearing loss to help them ‘stand up’ to bullies. Research tells us that a child if a child can stand up to the bully, they are less likely to become victims of bullying.
One important way to help your child is to give them the language to articulate that their difference is not a weakness. By showing acceptance and understanding of their hearing loss they can diffuse some bullying situations and build your child's resilience. As a parent with a child on the Autism spectrum learnt: “I know from vast experience with these children and with typical children that when parents constantly teach acceptance and love toward those who are different, bullying happens considerably less.”
Teach your child statements such as; "I have a hearing loss. This means I don’t hear like you and I need my hearing aids / cochlear implant to hear". "With my hearing aids / cochlear implants I can hear!"
Ensure your child can manage her/his hearing device as early as possible, teach them how to put their own hearing aids in or cochlear implant coil back on if it comes off. By about the age of four years you can teach your child to put her hearing aids in – using a mirror for them to see how to put the mould in can be helpful. Taking your child’s hand to put the coil back on will ensure your child is independent in managing their device.
Don't give bullies the reaction they are looking for
You can help prevent your child from being a target by teaching him or her not to react to bullying and instead report to an adult. Bullies feed on reaction. If your child does not react, it is more likely the bully will lose interest. As Richard Maguire, who has Asperger’s syndrome, wrote, “Bullies are inadequate people; they cannot deal with confident people who will not be controlled by them.”
Communicate with the school
Bullying in schools can be a problem. Offer to go the classroom and chat with your child’s classmates about hearing loss, hearing aids or cochlear implants. Perhaps work with the teacher to find a mentor or buddy your child feels comfortable with to report bullying. Mentors can serve as a deterrent of bullying, since a bully often preys on a child who is alone.
Schedule regular meeting (monthly in the early years of school) with your child’s classroom teacher. Teachers are busy people so it is helpful to schedule a time when both you and the teacher have dedicated time to chat about your child.
Teach your child safe ways to use technology
Cyber bullying is becoming one of the most common forms of bullying and is even occurring with younger students in primary schools. Monitor your child’s social media platforms. Create an open communication path with your child whereby she/he feels safe to talk about what might be going on on-line.
Help your child express their feelings
Talking about bullying can be hard. Here are some techniques that might help them communicate their feelings:
Draw pictures of your child’s day or ask them to draw what has happened during their day. For example you could draw pictures of them at break, at lunchtime, in the classroom, moving about the school, draw what games they played.
Use toys, puppets or pets to encourage your child to talk. You could use them to tell a story of a child being bullied and show how important it is to tell someone. Or your child may feel more comfortable in telling a toy or puppet what is happening.
Use a diary system or a box where you can both write comments and questions and then find a quiet time to talk about them together.
Use scales to rate how your child is feeling at different times during their day. For example you could use a number scale or traffic light system where the different numbers or colours mean different feelings. If you use the traffic light system, you may use green for feeling good, orange for okay and red for upset.
Use pictures of faces showing different expressions to explain feelings. You could draw pictures of happy, sad, angry, crying faces and ask your child to choose one to show how they’re feeling.
Use visual prompts such as pictures in books, communication boards (visual symbols organised by topic) and cue cards (cards containing a message in a picture or written format).
With the right skills and empowerment, children with hearing loss can become resilient, stand up to bullying and thrive.
